In June I began seeing a therapist. I’d been interviewing coaches all year, but I really wanted someone to help discern God’s plan with me, so my daughter suggested Christian based counseling. Her name is Heather and she feels more like a guide.

She tells me I’m fun to meet with and she doesn’t have me on a set schedule which makes me think that my kind of crazy is harmless, for the most part. I see her every two weeks and the beginning of our session is like a catch up visit as I tell her what all I got into without her permission. She loves the relationship I have with God and we laugh over the conversations He has with me to keep me in line. This weeks discussion was about the bench.

I’ve been negotiating with God about this bench since May, which is the first time I laid eyes on it, but it’s been on my heart for years, and His immediate response was, “Not yet.” That hurt my feelings considering it’s THE bench I’ve always wanted since buying the firepit in 2019. So, I began hashing it out in my mind with thoughts like, “It’s almost summer and I’m not going to use the firepit during the summer, so I can wait”, or “There are plenty of them, so let’s wait and see how many of them sell.” Returning home, it was difficult to dismiss the bench from my mind, but I knew to wait.

Summer was coming to a close, so in August I called the store where I’d seen the benches for sale and asked if there were any left. The salesperson went outside to look and when he retuned to the phone he said, “There’s one left.” I was so excited and just knew this was God holding the bench for me, but before grabbing my keys and heading to the store, I paused and asked Him about buying the bench.

The answer was “Not yet.”

This is an exercise encouraged by my guide. Instead of running down my own path, she wants me to stop and ask, “What do you think, God?”

It’s completely frustrating. 😂

By now it’s the first week of October and I had pretty much given up on the bench. I didn’t need it because I purchased one for the firepit and it offers one sitting area, but I envision neighbors joining me around the fire this winter. This is how I was justifying the purchase while running errands last Saturday morning and I was so deep in thought, I missed my turn into the neighborhood!

I drove to the stoplight, but it was on green and I missed getting into the turn lane. It looked like my truck was taking me to the store with the bench to see if that ‘one’ was still there. This time of year, the garden center is almost empty and the outdoor furniture that didn’t sell over the summer is stored until next year, but out of curiosity, I decided to walk through the furniture area…

and, there it was. The bench.

I felt a nudge to go in and ask about the price. With it being the end of the season and only one left, it made sense that it should be on sale. Mama taught me, “You never know unless you ask.”

Stepping into the store, I asked for the owner/manager and was told where he was. I waited for him to finish helping a customer and he asked, “What can I help you with?” Out of my mouth came the words, “What is the best price you can give me on that curved bench outside? It’s the only one left.” He spoke with someone through the walkie talkie and said, “I can sell it to you for my price, $69.99.” I was in shock. That was more than half price off of the asking price!

I excitedly left the store with the bench knowing full well why my answer was always, ‘Not Yet.” It wasn’t that God didn’t want me to have the bench. He just wanted the timing to be right to receive the best price.